By now I hope it is apparent that the best cure for insomnia isn’t just one thing — it’s a magical blend of many different activities, techniques, and scheduling.
It’s also a matter of respecting your own natural cycles and the daily rhythm of life. This is what the sleep schedule, the pre-sleep routine, the attention to diet and exercise, and the relaxation techniques are for.
It’s also investing some time and effort into changing your perspective about sleep. This is what the CBT methods are for.
And it’s also developing more understanding of how your mind works when you’re in bed trying to fall asleep but can’t.
I also hope that you went through Day 8 even though it was a little convoluted (this tutorial is still a work in progress), because…
…it’s important to identify the thoughts, worries, anxieties and other tendencies that keep you awake and It’s even more important to use these tendencies to help yourself. In that way, the problem can help you find the solution.
For example, if you are analytical and an active thinker and planner (as so many insomniacs tend to be), you can use those skills to creatively solve the very problems keeping you up when you want to sleep.
The best cure for insomnia does not require a complete personal transformation. it’s simply
- Transferring your mental activity (what’s keeping you awake) to a better, more productive time and
- Transferring your energy to solving the problem (during the day) instead of beating yourself up about it endlessly, and…
- Once you’ve done this, letting go of the day… because you’ve done what you needed to… and letting go of tomorrow, because it’s not here yet, and when it comes, you can handle it fine.
OK, then, in Day 9, we’ll discuss another part of the best cure for insomnia: how to deal with depression, anger and frustration, which are different from worry and anxiety.
Pushed Aside and Ignored?
Depression, anger and frustration are emotions that tend to get pushed aside in the normal course of the day, only to unleash themselves furiously when your head hits the pillow.
They are also feelings that you tend to suppress and repress to the point of being unaware of their existence. However, they can lurk behind the scenes, sabotaging your sleep in more puzzling ways, such as causing middle insomnia and terminal insomnia — where you wake up and then can’t go back to sleep. And possibly give you disturbing dreams that wake you in your REM cycle.
Again, our emphasis is not so much on “curing” or eliminating these emotions. You can certainly work on your life problems at the same time you’re working on your sleep problems. But it’s not the real purpose of this tutorial, which is about finding the best cure for insomnia.
Here are some tips for dealing with mild depression, anger and frustration when it’s interfering with a good night’s sleep.
NOTE: I say “mild depression” because this is a self-help tutorial on insomnia, not a tutorial on depression. If you have serious depression, you must think about treatment for it as your first priority. Serious or clinical depression isn’t something you should mess around with. It CAN be treated, and you definitely deserve the best treatment available. Insomnia is not your main problem in this case.
Step One: First, you can follow the exact steps in the cure-for-worry article, which is to set aside time in the day to just experience these feelings and write down your thoughts about them. You should also review the article on subconscious causes of insomnia, for more tips.
Step Two: Next, you learn to let yourself feel OK in spite of these feelings. Now, I’m not saying you need to “get happy.” The cure for insomnia certainly does NOT depend on maintaining a constant state of bliss (I would be in serious trouble if it did).
But you must strive for enough relief of these disruptive emotions — during the hours you want to sleep.
It’s a matter of time management, really. It’s also a decision that you make, deliberately and consciously. You do this because you know it’s the foundation of the best cure for insomnia.
Step Three: You must be firm about this. No waffling.
Give yourself the opportunity to feel these emotions fully and freely for an hour a day or so.
Give yourself the opportunity to discover what is causing these feelings to come up in the first place.
Give yourself the opportunity to solve whatever problems are causing these problems. Remember the role of helplessness, especially in mild depression and frustration. It is the idea that you are trapped in an undesirable situation, powerless to change things, that often causes these mental states.
When you take action to change things, even if they are small, you immediately reverse this powerless feeling. You realize you are in charge after all.
OK, you’ve done all that? You’ve given yourself these opportunities to think, reflect, feel, ruminate and then solve? Great!
But then enough is enough! When it’s bedtime, you let go of it ALL. You change your mental state before you get into bed. You can do this as part of your pre-sleep routine.
Million Dollar Question: So how do you change your mental state before you go to bed?
- You can use CBT methods.
- You can use the letting-go technique.
- You can use the visualization technique.
- You can use progressive relaxation.
- You can use yoga, meditation, or just plain thinking and reasoning with yourself.
- You can use all of the above.
The most important thing isn’t what method you use, but your intention to use it for the purpose of changing your mental state, which is, after all is said and done, the best cure for insomnia.
So is my mantra “don’t worry, be happy?” Well, not exactly. We all know it’s not that simple.
But when you understand the best cure for insomnia is calming the stress response and getting your nervous system off of the hyperarousal treadmill and back to its natural cycles of alertness, wakefulness, relaxation and sleep… what do you do?
You go after it!
So be firm with your brain. Listen to your emotions and feelings. Learn the lessons they are trying to teach you.
Then tell your brain who’s the boss (that’s you), get under the covers and “bliss out” until you’re just plain “out”… like a light.